Funniest scenes from MOHB (SPOILERS!)

I think WRITTEN IN MY OWN HEART'S BLOOD might just be Diana Gabaldon's funniest book ever. <g> I can't tell you how many times I giggled or laughed out loud while reading.  So I thought it might be interesting to see what your favorite humorous bits are.

*** SPOILER WARNING!! ***

There are SPOILERS for WRITTEN IN MY OWN HEART'S BLOOD below.  If you haven't finished the book, and you don't want to know yet, don't read any further!

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Here are a few of my personal favorites:

1) Claire's memory of the Vestal virgins:

I’d considered that with a sort of morbid relish--I might have been ten--and then asked with interest just how a vestal might betray her vows. Which is how I learned what used to be called “the facts of life,” Uncle Lamb not being one to shirk any fact that wandered across his path, or mine. And while Uncle Lamb had assured me that the cult of Vesta had long since ceased operations, I had at that point resolved not to be a virgin, just in case.

(From WRITTEN IN MY OWN HEART'S BLOOD by Diana Gabaldon, chapter 55, "Vestal Virgins". Copyright© 2014 by Diana Gabaldon. All rights reserved.)

2) Ian and Rachel on their wedding night:

“Here I am, tryin’ to go slow, tryin’ to be gentle...and next thing I ken, ye’re squeezin’ my balls and stickin’ your fingers up my arse!”

(From WRITTEN IN MY OWN HEART'S BLOOD by Diana Gabaldon, "A Coda in Three-Two Time". Copyright© 2014 by Diana Gabaldon. All rights reserved.)

3) Jenny, Jamie, and Hal:

“Mr. Fraser,” he said, in a voice that was almost steady. “Your servant, sir.”

“Your most obedient, Your Grace,” Jamie replied, suffering an insane urge to laugh, and kept from it only by the sure knowledge that his sister would immediately reload and shoot him at point-blank range if he did. “I see ye’re acquainted with my sister, Mrs. Murray.”

“Your--dear lord, she is.” Pardloe’s eyes had flicked back and forth between their faces, and he now drew a long, slow breath. “Is your entire family given to irascibility?”

“We are, Your Grace, and I thank ye for the compliment,” Jamie said, and laid a hand on Jenny’s back.

(From WRITTEN IN MY OWN HEART'S BLOOD by Diana Gabaldon, chapter 23, "In Which Mrs. Figg Takes a Hand". Copyright© 2014 by Diana Gabaldon. All rights reserved.)

What about the rest of you? What are some of your favorite humorous lines or scenes from this book?